Unhealthy Relationships!

Unhealthy Relationships

un·health·y (n-hlth)
adj. un·health·i·er, un·health·i·est

a. Being in a state of ill health; sick.

2 Samuel 13:9-11

9 Then she took the pan and served him the bread, but he refused to eat.

“Send everyone out of here,” Amnon said. So everyone left him. 10 Then Amnon said to Tamar, “Bring the food here into my bedroom so I may eat from your hand.” And Tamar took the bread she had prepared and brought it to her brother Amnon in his bedroom. 11 But when she took it to him to eat, he grabbed her and said, “Come to bed with me, my sister.”

Amnon lusted after his sister Tamar. She had morals and boundries yet he didnt respect them. Really he didn't even care about her feelings he just wanted what he wanted and he didn't care if anyone else got hurt in the process. It was onesided he only cared about his own needs! He was pretending to be sick so that he could have his sister sexually yet in all reality he was really sick.I have lived a life of not having really healthy relationships. It started so young that when I hit my teen years I was so damaged!( PArents watch how you treat you kids) So being in a healthy relationship has always been really hard for me to understand. Belittling, Physical abuse, Neglect, Being treated as a Sex Object has always been my reality. Alot of people have gotten away with alot of things in my life and been able to treat me in any kind of way they like because I did not know any better because it was the Norm for me to just let anyone treat me anytype of way. At one point I believed abuse was a form of love and so I loved that way. The abused became the abuser. This relationship Amnon had with his sister was far from healthy! And No one Should Have to go threw something like this!


Speak Up For Yourself!

2 Samuel 13:12-16  12 “No, my brother!” she said to him. “Don’t force me! Such a thing should not be done in Israel! Don’t do this wicked thing. 13 What about me? Where could I get rid of my disgrace? And what about you? You would be like one of the wicked fools in Israel. Please speak to the king; he will not keep me from being married to you.” 14 But he refused to listen to her, and since he was stronger than she, he raped her. 15 Then Amnon hated her with intense hatred. In fact, he hated her more than he had loved her. Amnon said to her, “Get up and get out!” 16 “No!” she said to him. “Sending me away would be a greater wrong than what you have already done to me.” 

 I know your reading this like well she spoke up for herself and he still hurt her and sent her away. Sometimes people need to understand their destructive patterns because some people don't even know that they are sick. They believe that their actions in which they are doing are okay. I spent a year abusing someone and didn't even understand that it wasn't okay that I was abusing them. Until oneday I woke up and said why are they crying? It was because I was hurting them and didn't even understand that what I was doing wasn't Normal because to me it was something NORMAL. People always hurt me this is love right? Sin makes us sick and sometimes people don't realize how sick they are in their sin until someone SPEAKS UP! 


 Dont Just Sit there Get up 
 des·o·late /ˈdesəlit/ Adjective (of a place) Deserted of people and in a state of bleak and dismal emptiness.
 2 Samuel 13:17-20 17 He called his personal servant and said, “Get this woman out of my sight and bolt the door after her.” 18 So his servant put her out and bolted the door after her. She was wearing an ornate[a] robe, for this was the kind of garment the virgin daughters of the king wore. 19 Tamar put ashes on her head and tore the ornate robe she was wearing. She put her hands on her head and went away, weeping aloud as she went. 20 Her brother Absalom said to her, “Has that Amnon, your brother, been with you? Be quiet for now, my sister; he is your brother. Don’t take this thing to heart.” And Tamar lived in her brother Absalom’s house, a desolate woman. Tamar lived in her brothers house and was a desolate woman. 


Dont just sit there get up. Sometimes realtionships are unhealthy but you don't have to feel trapped like their is no hope after. There is always and after. I know Ive been in unhealthy relationships, and I've been through abuse in many forms. Yet I didn't just sit there I got up! Even after I became the abuser I got up and learned to not allow what happened to me affect my life and those around me. Yet change my actions to be a better person. So that I can live a healthier life building healthy relationships. So don't just sit there but Get up! 


 A start of a Healthy Relationship! 


 health·y /ˈhelTHē/ Adjective In good health 
 Genesis 29:18 And Jacob loved Rachel; and said, I will serve thee seven years for Rachel thy younger daughter. 

 Jacob loved Rachael this was the start of their love relationship!There is someone out there who will love you. No things won't be perfect yet you can be loved. Start with God he loves you! Starting a relationship with Jesus Christ says you love yourself enough to want to spend eternity in heaven with someone who died for you on the cross for your sins. Yes he loved you that much he died for you!John 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. Now thats love! For me this scripture means alot because I never believed people could love or at least be happy in love. This man was so happily in love he worked seven years for the love of one woman. His love for her was not just words but actions. They showed that he was willing to do anything to prove he loved her.Just like Christ did when he died for your sins! Amnon said he loved his sister but his actions showed that he didn't he lusted after her. Lust is not love! Yet When you find that love don't take it forgranted of having that love because not everyone is fortunate to be recieve a love like that. They settle for unhealthy relationships sometimes they die because of unhealthy relationships because of the sin, Because of the Abuse,the Neglect. Get up, get healed give your life to Christ and start living a life in a healthy relationship!